Hard Work Usually Pays Off

I would say  that hard work pays off, but that would imply that there would be an always attached to that.  Which is not the case every single time.  Hard work does in fact pay off, and I think it is better to say that it usually does, or most often does, or just simply state the word often.  That way, if the hard work does not pay off, at least you know there was always a possibility of it not actually paying off.  

Now that I am learning another language and as well as taking classes about teaching English, I am more aware of phrases and idioms in English and what they mean and the origins of them.  I only mention this because of the phrase "paying off."  We pay off a bill.  But when you really think about it, what exactly is paying off?  And how does it apply to the titled phrase?  Just something for you to think about and ponder now. :)  

I had my figure skating and japanese competitions this past weekend.  On Friday I had my Adult Bronze freeskate competition.  I don't know if I mentioned this or not, but because this year, 2014, was suppose to be my year for the Olympics had I stayed with the sport, I was treating Fiesta Skate as if I were competing in the Olympics  I must have convinced myself of this fact, because it most certainly felt like I was in the Olympics.  Oh my goodness.  I was nervous, I thought that I would let so many people down had I failed.  I don't know why I did that.  Anyway.  So, that Friday was my "short program" and my dramatic was my "long program" so to speak.  I know it's not actually true, but it made myself feel better to think about it that way.  I keep getting off track!

I arrived at Fiesta quite early because I had practiced at Oceanside for a while.  So I was bored for a very long time. I watched many of the little kids perform.  It was really cute.  Some of them were adorable and I wonder how the judges can score them.  They are just too adorable.  After an hour or so, I got ready for my program.  I was warming up, got my dress on  that I made, and my competitor showed up.  All I kept thinking about was how I wanted to do better than her.  I was skating first so that meant that I got to watch her and see how she did compared to how I felt I did.  I got out there and did my best, actually, that's a lie.  I did not do my best.  I screwed up two flips and my last spin was just non existant.  I felt horrible.  I knew that the only way I was going to win was if everyone else failed worse than me.  And that did not happen.  I lost.  I came in last.  I walked away from the first day of competition feeling so discouraged and questioning my role in the sport as an adult.  Other adults can do the jumps and spins with ease and I can't seem to get my free leg under control.  I was honestly thinking about quitting.  

The next day, I had to teach kids ice skating.  I knew I needed to be there because so many of the coaches were at fiesta.  After my lesson, I had free ice time, so I practices.  Then I met an 18 year old.  She told me that she had quit the sport for several months, and now she can't seem to get her feet underneither her dispite having returned to the sport a couple months ago.  She was watching me with envy at how I could manage myself and skate so smoothly.  I was taken aback.  She was someone who just a year ago could do doubles and now can inconsistantly land a lutz.  Hearing her struggles with ice skating made me realize that I'm not the only one with freeleg issues.  (It likes to have it's own brain).  After she left and skated with confidence and did my best to shut my mind down and just my muscles do all the work.  And I was amazed at how easily the jumps happened and how soft all the landings are.  I have a feeling that after posting this, I will not be able to replicate this feeling. 

Sunday arrived, I get to the ice rink ready to go skate then speed off to the speech contest.  I had in my music, prepared to get chaged into my dress, when I am told that I don't skate for another 45 minutes.  That would make me late for my speech contest.  I immediately texted my sensei to ask about the schedule and I was most deffinately going to be late.  I didn't want to miss ice skating.  I had worked so hard, I had used to much of my time in the morning putting on make up and doing my hair.  I had practiced so long.  I could not wait to do this program.  I had been looking forward to it for so long.  I could not believe I had wanted to quit the sport a couple days prior.  I could feel the tears forming a party in my eyes when I realized that I would need to quit skating that day and just head to ASU. The more I thought about it, and went over the times and math in my head, the more I realized that I had never wanted to give up skating just to give a speech.  If I am late, I am late.  If I don't do the speech, I don't do the speech.  I did not care anymore.  I came here to win a gold medal in my "Olympics" and that is just what I was going to do.

I told my coach that I was determined to stay and do the program then just leave without knowing my results of the competition. I skated last and I decided that I was not going to watch my competitors.  Davis and White did not watch, Kristy Yamaguchi didn't watch, and neither did Terra Lapinski.  They all wont gold medals.  If it worked for them, then it's gonna work for me.  I warmed up, felt good. stood with my back to the ice and waited for my time to skate.  Now Idk if you know me, but when it comes to cold, I hate it.  I was complaining the entire time of being cold, but once I skate, nothing is cold anymore.  In fact, nothing else exists anymore.  I only fly.  It's the greatest feeling in the world.

My time came, I step out on the ice, do my best, made a little bobble after my flip jump. (Again?!) then rush off to change.  On my way out, my coach tells me to pick up my medal because I just won.  I won? I actually legitimately beat someone because of my abilities???  I coulden't believe it.  I rushed to get my medal then my husband and I sped to the Speech contest.  After running over a bucket, pulling over to yank it out, going the wrong way, running in heels from the parking lot to the building, I made it at the last possible second wearing my gold medal.  After catching my breadth, I present my speech flawlessly.  I had never had such a great run through before.  I actually used ice skating techniques. When I heard myself speed up too much that a mistake would soon come, I would take a breath, and slow down.  If I felt nervous, I blinked very slowly and when I opened my eyes, I smiled wide.  I used hand gestures, but when I did, I used them like moving through jello.  I did not think, I just trusted my mind to already know what I had been drilling into it for many many months.  It could not have gone any better.

After an hour or so, it was the awards ceremony, and they announced everyone by category, which meant that mine would be last.  I was nervous again.  I wanted to get at least second place.  I did not care about winning the speech.  I just was glad that I made it on time, and really wanted to win this japanese restaurant certificate that everyone was getting.  My category came, second place prizes were called, and my name was not mentioned.  I was so upset.  I could not believe I did not get second.  I was really upset.  I almost started crying.  Then they annouced the prizes for the first place and I was not even listening.  I was too upset that I did not get second.  Then, out of no where, my name gets called.  I, I won?  I won!  I let out a squeal of delight and bounded up on stage like Bambi.  I accepted my prize and was beaming.  That day could not have been any better.  It was the best day I had had in a long time.  It was wonderful.

We went out to lunch (my husbnad and I), actually dinner, afterwards.  I told him to go to the place that my gift certificate could take us, and low and behold, the one prize I realy REALLY wanted to get, I did not recieve.  I guess I was suppose to buy books and not food.  Oh well. 

My point in all of this is that hard work usually pays off.  It didn't on Friday, but it certainly did on Sunday.  Holy cookies did it ever. :)